low points...getting better, hopefully!

As I was sitting in the dentist chair yesterday for the first time in probably 5 years I was busy stressing out about 32 other things I need to be doing. They took my blood pressure; "text book, perfect," they said. This is unusually high for me and do you know what message that sent to me? You let it all get to you! You allowed all of it (the negative happenings in life) finally break you down. I have always, always prided myself in letting things just be, however it was meant to be will always work itself out, there is no reason to stress about it. And here I did just that. I don't have an answer why I allowed it, and now that I have I'm struggling on how to let it all go.

After two weeks of negative after negative filtering in my life, I'm trying really really hard to learn my lesson but in the end I just end up in tears. I think I have cried more in the past two weeks than I have cried in the past year. I would rather not rehash everything because I'm trying really hard to remember only positives.

I'm going to look at the 'blood pressure, light bulb moment' to be the moment as I remember everything getting better and I'm going to list every positive thing that happened in the last two weeks... Here goes ...

-- All 4 of us had great check ups at the dentist (except for 1 minor issue that was already taken care of)

-- I was able (forced) to rest/mend my tired/achy muscles.

-- I had some extra time to play board games with my kids

-- I have had the opportunity to read a book about appreciating what I have in the present

--I have been reminded that I am surrounded by great friends and supportive family

-- I got my taxes all done and ready to mail in

I know, not a very long list but its a start. And the start is always the hardest part.

So I'm going to choose to focus on the positives for now...And try to get my life back to normal.

Training frustrations, starting early

I know you were all expecting this post, probably thought it would have been later in the week, but alas, here we are on Monday and I'm already stressed about not running. I had a very busy weekend, I can't even remember if I went to run Friday morning. I was supposed to run three miles on Saturday and I didn't do it because of the snow, but instead I tried a new workout on a FitWall. I'm still sore from that, and it was great interval training. Then this morning the alarm went off to go run another 3 miles and my body wouldn't move. I'm so tired, probably a combination of the training, the running kids everywhere and only being at my house for sleeping over the weekend. I read a blog this morning and the author wrote last week that she was frustrated with her running because she seemed so tired and runs were hard etc etc. But happy to report that this week is easier. I so hope that things align for me, sooner than later. I keep telling myself that missing a run or two is not a big deal as long as all the long runs are met. I hope I'm not fooling myself. Palisade is a great course and I just want to feel good and hopefully do better than the 2:02 from last year. Hopefully with combing my running with some other total body strengthening things will come together, like a perfect storm.

Brooke had a dance competition over the weekend. This one went much smoother than last month's and I'm happy to report that Brooke was much nicer to me this time than last. It helps that she knows what to expect now and I know what to expect, so I'm a lot better prepared. 2 of her dances scored better than last time and 1 of them made it into the top 10; I'm happy to see the improvement. Makes all those hours of driving around and waiting worth it.

Palisade update & others

Training for Palisade has officially started. I've got my long runs, I've been doing more stuff on the treadmill than ever before, I've only skipped a few of the runs during the week, mostly because of weather. However, I have yet to run a true tempo run. Really, I know I'm scared of it, but that isn't why I haven't run one yet. The first week, it was snowing so crazy that I decided it wouldn't be safe, the next week my partner that I recruited ditched me. And now, my partner has ditched me yet again, but I'm running. It might not be a true tempo run, but will be miles and hopefully that will help. Over the weekend I ended up running over 17 miles. I didn't plan it that way, it just happened. And although I was exhausted on Sunday night, my body handled the mileage pretty well. I'm sure there is a lesson here, that maybe a marathon wouldn't be totally out of the question. The first track session of the year started this week also. I felt good, but I didn't push it for best times, I was aiming for 10k pace and I was able to do that. That makes me happy and I'm at a good starting point for the year. The kind of frustrating part of this deal is that this week my mileage will be closer to 30, next week based on the schedule is about 1/2. I know I should love the recovery weeks but they scare me into thinking I'm not going to be prepared.

This was from a beautiful snowy day that we spent in Evergreen ice skating and sledding! So much fun!

 

Because I know everyone cares about other things than just my running issues...I will update...Tyler just finished up with indoor soccer. Although they didn't do great as far as winning games, they did grow as a team and really get the concept of passing and defending and holding positions. Tyler has been playing much better and I'm so happy to see the growth. Tyler has also started piano lessons. He loves the teacher and has decided that he wants to play in the recital. Which is great, except the recital is in a month and he has only been playing for a month. He will do great I know...but wow! Brooke is still dancing. Her dances have made it to nationals, so she is happy and the memories she will make and remember will be amazing. She is also playing the piano and doing very well. I'm happy to see her hold it all together.

Palisade training

Official training for me starts on Monday for the Grand Valley 1/2. I'm not sure why I feel like it is such a big deal. It isn't as if I haven't been going to the gym and running. Maybe it is because I have taken the time this year to write down some goals and in order for those goals to happen, one must train for them. I have been running long enough and had enough disappointing finishes to know that you can't just pray for a strong race, you have to train your butt off and pray for it.

Perhaps I'm also a little nervous because I have decided to try a new training plan for myself this time around. Before, I have always had someone tell me how to do things and when to do them and this time I am a little more on my own. It will be good for me, to push myself, not rely on others to keep the pace but learn to feel it all on my own. I have taken a training plan from Hal Higdon for an advanced runner (which I question if I'm even qualified for) then I tweaked it a little and then another coach/friend tweaked it again for me. This time I'm including tempo runs, which quite frankly, scare me. They sound hard and intimidating and did I say hard? On those runs I will have to run with someone as I usually don't push myself like I could/should. And instead of going by miles on my long runs I will be going by time. I tried this method once before and it didn't work out so well. However, there is this thing, called consistency and that may have been part of the problem. I'm aiming for a 1 hour 50 min 1/2 marathon time. Grand Valley is a hard course so I will need to train hills and flats alike. I'm excited, yet intimidated by the schedule. One day at a time though. Yesterday I read an article mentioning how to focus your time during marathon / 1/2 marathon training. I'm still learning. This is probably part of the reason I haven't signed up for a marathon, I can barely get my training for a 1/2 in let alone doubling the mileage.

I'm excited for this race, as it has been since last August that I have been in 'training.' My last couple of 5k's have been a little disappointing just because I hoped for more and when you aren't working on turnover and speed and hills you don't have great races. You just race. I remember trying to remind myself that it is off season, I will be fine. And you know what, from a year ago my 5K is faster...just not my fastest. I guess I do understand that there will eventually be a time when I won't be working on getting faster, instead working toward staying the same. For right now I'm going to hope I'm continuing to get faster, it is kinda motivating.

Brooke's first dance competition

Brooke had her first dance competition this last weekend. And remembering that I'm her mom so it is easy for her to let me see her true colors, she almost didn't live to make it to her first number. I did try and put myself in her position with her nerves and fear of the unknown, I did try to understand that for a 9 year old this is a lot to handle. But you can see my battle here...

Notice how cute all the girls look? All innocent and beautiful...

Now I encourage you to look at Brooke's fabulous reaction when she noticed I was taking pictures. If looks could kill, I wouldn't be here right now.

But see how beautiful she is? Who wouldn't want to take pictures of this?

 

Out of all the dances this one was Brooke's least favorite, however all the girls did amazing and ended up getting an 'intesity' award out of this. It is safe to say that Brooke has rethought her favorite dances. After dancing on Saturday we went to dinner with some of the teachers and other students and their families... Yes, this guy teaches my kid to dance. Mom of the year material right here ;). It's a good thing Brooke thinks this guy is amazing.

 

 

Finally after an early morning (leaving the house when it was still dark) a long drive, a lot of hair teasing and then some waiting, some sowing and more waiting and face painting here is Brooke for her last number...

 

 

I think she looks awesome, but she thinks she looks ridiculous.

 

Just so you know my life isn't completely about my kids. I was able to get up early on Saturday and get a run in. A beautiful run at a new trail, it was peaceful and easy to get lost in your own thoughts and spirit lifting. Funny how the universe works in mysterious ways. Had I not had the uplifted spirit, there is a good chance I would have strangled Brooke. more mom of the year material ;).

 

This week has been a little easier for me, in terms of not so many things to get done. See I think that until I remember that Valentine's Day is just a few days away and no party planning has occured, and I have a 5K to run this weekend and I'm sure I'm not in 5K shape not to mention the pain I have been having along the whole left side of my body.

 

 

Cabo Trip 2013

We got back from Cabo just in time to thoroughly enjoy the 5 degree temperature here in Denver. Sometimes I wonder why we live here.....

Maybe this is why...

Anyway, our trip to Cabo started a little rocky when the people at the hotel tried to be super pushy and get us into a sales pitch deal. I had to turn mean before I walked away. After that however, things vastly improved. I would have to say that the beach (Medano Beach to be exact) is pretty fabulous. I mean where else are you going to find a 3 mile span of perfect sand to run, build and play in along with calm water that's only fault is too much salt?

I finally got over (a little bit) my fear of swimming in the ocean. I've always been a little scared of the unknown and pure enormity of the ocean that I couldn't imagine letting my feet get off the ground. Maybe it was a combination of my want to swim and maybe a little courage from not showing my kids any fear that finally got me out there. The hotel also had set up a roped off swimming area that boats and jet ski's aren't allowed to enter. For some reason I think the fish might have missed the memo to stay out. So the first day, off I went to swim the length (just a simple out and back) and it felt like forever to get to the rope and turning around felt like I was working so hard and getting no where but then all of a sudden I was back on shore. After a slow progression I got up to swimming 4 lengths at a time. Each time I would venture out the experience was a little different, a boat would get close and make weird waves, the current was different etc etc etc. I can't say I'm totally over my fear but I'm doing better. And in the midst of it all Brooke did some swimming also, in the ocean, on her own. I'm so proud it didn't take her 32 years to figure it out. Lou and Tyler on the other hand still have their feet planted solidly on the sand.

The famous arch

We took a boat out to find some whales, see the arch (lands end) and maybe find some Sea Lions. The funny thing about Cabo is one side is the Pacific Ocean and the other side is the Sea of Cortes. The Pacific Ocean side is so chopping and rough that being in a small boat can be frightful, especially for my land loving family. It is crazy how you could almost draw a line in the ocean to see the difference. We did get to see a whale and we were reminded how giant of animals they really are. The cool part, in my opinion is that we saw a sea turtle that came to the top. He was giant and gentle and awesome. We saw the sea lions and the arch and some "Nemo and Dory" fish. In the end a fabulous adventure.

The rocks where we would watch the boats and Sea Lions

We loved playing in the sand, I actually enjoyed running in the sand this time. Lou and I went running together one morning and he totally kicked my butt which made me super sad, but then he had to walk back and I ended up waiting for him. We walked into town a couple of times and watched the boats go in and out of the marina. The kids liked to watch the sea lions and build sand castles and swim. Tyler actually made a lot of progress with his comfort in the water. I'm excited about that. They also loved "happy hour" (who doesn't right?) so they could get a virgin strawberry daiquiri, that they would never drink. In the end, just to have some time where you aren't inflicted with places to be and things to do etc etc is fabulous. To wake up when you wake up and do things whatever you want, this can be totally re-energizing.

 

The sunrise was beautiful!

 

Possibly my new favorite picture of us!

 

Christmas Letter 2012

The family in Beaver Creek.

Here we are again...The middle of December and the end of the year is looming and my Christmas cards have been sent out, again with no letter...So here is my effort at yet another Christmas letter, in the form of a blog so only those that want to read it can. As I ponder all the activities that have happened in the last year I'm saddened that yet another year is gone, but excited that we had the opportunities and challenges that have come our way. We truly are grateful for the position we are in.

As a family we have done many great activities, we started the year with a trip to Cancun. I have to digress a little here and thank my parents for the fabulous opportunity of being able to go on a vacation every January. Anyway, Cancun was amazing. Louis, the kids and I perfected our days by the pool and beach and figured out a way to fit all of that hard work in. We got an amazing tan after the burned skin figured out how to be in the sun for such extended periods of time. We also spent some time in Beaver Creek over the summer and a weekend in Steamboat in November. Every time we travel I'm reminded of what a fabulous place I live.

I'll start my summation with Tyler...my little man isn't so little anymore. He went in Kindergarten last year a timid, shy scared little boy and in the spring he came out a confident little man. I have to Thank Mrs. Clapes for how she has shaped both my kids really but more Tyler. So far I have to say first grade has been something like an easy glide for Tyler. He started off the year in August telling his teacher 'you won't be able to trick me!' I'm not sure where the confidence has come from but I love it. I also love the fact that she hasn't been able to trick him.

Tyler and Mrs. Clapes, the Kindergarten teacher on the last day...

Tyler tried his bout with flag football last winter and spring. And although he liked it, he only liked it because his cousins were there with him. He then played spring and fall soccer with the same team he has been playing with for a couple of years now. He loves the group of boys and the team really is good. This winter he has decided it is indoor soccer that he wants to play. And he is also trying to decide if he wants to play tackle football since he is old enough...As a mom I hope he just sticks with soccer, but I will support whatever decision he makes. Tyler also did pretty well this summer learning how to swim, he definitely is not a fish yet, but is making progress. This has made me happy and my trips to the pool much nicer. Over the summer Tyler also ran track and his sad to see that this year is probably the last year that he can do the 'mini' program and next year will have to jump up with the big kids.

Our trip to Moab...Tyler really likes hiking, except when he is sick...then we must carry the man, not our best trip ever!

 

Tyler still smiling after a snowball fight in Steamboat!

 

Brooke...Brooke...she is my busy kid. If we aren't running her somewhere I wouldn't know what to do with my life. She is still dancing and making amazing progress, like she just finally 'gets' it. Right now she is dancing 3 nights a week and Saturdays. That in itself has put a hamper on our weekend travels. We did have a small bump in the road because the Ballet teacher that she was super happy with had decided to pursue other opportunities. Therefor Brooke has had to adjust to a new teacher with different ideas. She is adjusting but still sad with the situation. Thank goodness she is happy with her other teachers.

Brooke with the old Ballet teacher, Ms. Kate, on recital day!

Brooke has also taken up Piano. Since we finally figured out we really do have a fabulous piano and we had the finish redone and the internal workings fixed, she decided she isn't busy enough and piano lessons are next up. She has done well with that. We found a great teacher close to the house and Brooke is having lots of fun with it. Besides piano and dance, Brooke also ran track over the summer and decided she would do her first 5K. Although she complained the entire time, she did finish and I couldn't be happier.

Brooke at the finish of her first 5k!

Brooke finished 3rd grade very happily and tried to convince her teacher to teach 4th grade also. He politely declined, but she still does talk to him often after school and in the hallways. I'm also excited to report that the mean girl syndrome seems to have taken a back seat for awhile. This school year is also the first one where Brooke didn't have a giant adjustment period where she would come home crying. So I owe her teacher a huge "Thank you!"

Brooke in Moab! Completely out of her element.

You know, it is so much easier to talk about the kids. And while writing this I begin to wonder if anyone really cares about the adults...But I will continue on... I'm sure you will notice the amount of pictures is about the drastically decrease...

The kids on a trip up Lookout Mountain...

Louis and the kids getting ready for the annual 4th of July Parade!

Louis still is working the 2 jobs. I can tell that it finally is wearing him out. Being positive I'm happy to see the man is human, on the other side we miss him at home a lot. Over the summer he did have some time off and he took up running with me. I won't lie, I had the best 2 months running with him and have him push me as much as I pushed him. We ended the summer with a 5K at the local high school which happens to be a super low key event and timing is also super low key...however, I go prepared....Anyway, his first 5K had a finish time of 24:06, which to you non runner types is really good. Like better than I had been doing...However, life got in the way of our running together and the second 5k was about a minute slower. Lou was sad about the whole situation, maybe more of the realization that he isn't superman after all. Louis also continued his traditional yard battle with the neighbor, again this year I'm sure it was a tie, but you know...the man is never happy. Also, this fall Lou got a taste of coaching soccer for a few weeks...and the funny part about that whole deal, is Lou didn't know the first thing about soccer. Apparently next year he is planning on being an assistant. Thank goodness for "you tube" lessons.

Louis and Tyler getting ready for Brooke's parade.

 

 

As for me, the past year has been filled with running, running kids around and working. I have changed my schedule at work to make it possible for Brooke to dance as much as she does. This has worked out well for me as I'm not as far behind at work as I usually am. For running, I started the year with a resolution 5K on New Years day and I set a PR. I remember freezing...I'm not sure I'll sign up to do that one again. I also ran a 5K in February and was reminded that ice isn't that fun to run on as well as every race can't be a PR. After that I submerged myself into 1/2 marathon training and in May headed over to Palisade to run which was amazing. I would have to read my race report again, but if memory serves I had fun and would sign up for this race again. At the time I set a PR for me, but it is one of those things, I'm just never happy.

There is a reason I never take pictures of myself while running! Just in case, that time behind me is 'gun time' The official 'chip time' is from when I crossed the start line to the finish line.

A few more 5k's and then the Georgetown to Idaho Springs 1/2. Last year this race reminded me that if you want miracles to happen to have to train for miracles. This year I trained for miracles and set my current PR at 1:55:16 which was better than I could have hoped for. So, I must send out a Thank you to the girls at the running club for convincing me to sign up for that one.

Some of the girls from the running club after the Georgetown race!

I then ran the 5k's with Lou and set another PR of 24:02. I guess you can sum that up with this has been a successful year in the running department. At the end of October a friend and I took over the day to day happenings of the running club. I'm not sure it is a good thing, but we are trying. Sometimes change isn't that fun. It seems that things are going alright so far but not without many meetings, thoughts and ideas later. I didn't get any hiking in this year, which saddens me because I really did have hopes. I guess the universe is trying to tell me something, and I'm really trying to listen.

So, really the year for the Krapes' house has been great. We have all grown and matured and become more confident people. I'm so thankful for every lesson that has come our way to mold us into who we are. I'm thankful for my friends and family for all the amazing support, encouragement and advice that they give me everyday, maybe without even knowing it.

I wish everyone the happiest of New Years and best wishes for next year!