Palisade Race Report

So I have avoided it, cried about it and finally made my peace with it...Palisade was rough. No, let me rephrase...Palisade the trip was great, just what I needed to fix me. (Not that I was broken too badly). The race itself was rough. I have now waited over a week to give my race report because I again had to process it all...

I drove over to Palisade on Friday, following some friends. I was making efforts to stay hydrated but I'm not positive now that I was hydrated. Anyway, we checked into the hotel and then decided to find a winery to hang out at. We found a really nice one with a patio and good wine. It was really nice and relaxing and nice to be with friends.

We went to dinner and all the timing was working out great. Got up early for the race and I had a stomach ache, I thought it was nerves so I ignored it all and went on with my usual activities. The beginning of the race was low key as this race is really small...really small. I started out feeling great and I was running a great pace about 8.34 min miles for the first 3 miles. Then there is a giant hill and my time was 10 min. I was actually happy with that because it is a tough hill. Mile 5, 6 and 7 were good, back to 9 min miles and then the turn around...I got dizzy, a stomach ache, dry heaves...I tried to run through it but it kept getting worse so I had to walk. I walked for 30 min, through 2 aide stations and couldn't handle being on the course anymore. I started running again with 3 miles left and I was able to run the first mile but had to walk up all the hills. Needless to say I was beyond disappointed. I cried and thought I was ok and cried some more. I have yet to look up the official time, and I really don't care what it says. While I was walking I was texting Lou and he said it best..."you need to get over yourself and forget about the clock and just run, you are stronger than this." It might be right in that I need to forget about the time, but clearly I wasn't stronger than this. Along the way a girl from the club had injured her knee...I walked with her for awhile but ended up leaving her when I started running again. We ended up going back to help her, piggy back her and carry her but she finally crossed the finish line and go her medal. This just goes to show that we leave no runner behind.

 

 

In all of my thoughts since the race (and trust me I had plenty of time to think since I had a 3 1/2 hour drive home), I still don't know about the stomach issue but I have come to realize that even the best athletes have crappy days. The day after the race I was going to quit running, the next day I figured I needed to stop licking my wounds and figure out what I was going to do. Right now the plan is recovery last week, a long run this week, short run next week one more long run and then taper and try to run the Slacker 1/2 marathon. And I know I'm not out trying to set any records I just can't slow down my racing on such a terrible outing. I've also learned through all of this that the time really doesn't matter...all that matters is that I was out there making an effort and that every day I make an effort to better myself. I seem to be the only one that cares what kind of time I do and where I place.

 

 

Long run accomplished!

"Racing teaches us to challenge ourselves. It teaches us to push beyond where we thought we could go. It helps us to find out what we are made of. This is what we do. This is what it's all about." -- Patti Sue Plumer

In the last 2 weeks my running has gone from "I hate this training all the time and having to run such long mileage" with tons of frustrations of running on the treadmill because the weather has been snowy and wet. I even told some people that I may or may not be on strike from signing up for more races and just being able to run when I am able and however far I want, that I am going to spend my summer hiking instead of having to train all the time. But after the weekend I have a little more confidence back and things are looking up in my world. Ok, I'm still not signing up for more races but I'm not mad that I did anymore. That is progress. Over the weekend I finished my last long run for the training session and I think I might be all down hill from here meaning that runs will hopefully be easier and little more fun filled.  

Saturday morning it was a brutal long run associated with many self to self meetings reminding me that this is all possible and at the end all worth it. Lets just say when I thought I could just run straight home instead of the 1/2 mile out of the way loop I had to ask myself how I would feel 15 minutes after I was done. Happy that I accomplished such feats or bummed because I shorted myself a measly 1/2 mile? Running 1/2 mile comes down to 5 minutes really and I had to be reminded that I would only feel guilty all day long for not taking the extra 5 minutes after I had already taken the time to run 12.5. And yes, I was painfully sore all day Saturday, but not sore enough to lay in bed the next morning and miss out on running with the club. So there would be the confidence level. If I can do back to back runs like that I should be fine for this 1/2 marathon coming up. Don't get me wrong, there is discouragement in the fact that I haven't been able to run the track in a month and I haven't done many tempo runs so I'm not setting any records, but I'll be able to finish with a smile on my face. Sometimes, that has to be the goal.  

Great life lessons!

Today, keeping the day easy, I was reading a blog and I read something that totally rang home. I wish I would have listened a bit more when I was a teenager so that I wouldn't have to learn as many lessons when I was growing up.

This is her list...

12 Things I Would Want My 12-Year-Old-Self to Know:

1. Being perfect is over-rated. No One and No Thing is perfect. Striving for perfection will only make you unhappy. Remember to always show up as who you are, and do not apologize for that. Your job is to be the best Emma you can be. Be yourself. Be your own person. Always do and say what is true for you and you cannot go wrong.

This is completely true! So true, in fact, that I'm trying to teach my 10 year this now. Please, please understand that it is alright to make mistakes while trying to be the best person you can be.

2. You will meet some boy someday who you think you cannot live without. But if he makes you change who you are, or makes you think less of yourself or does not live up to your high standards of what you think you deserve, he is not the one for you. Always know what you are worth.

This worked out for me, it was easy...for everyone, however it isn't so easy but always know and understand that you deserve the best.

3. Having good friends is essential – a true gift in your life. A friend always has your best interests in mind, but a friend is not always perfect. Remember that just like you, your friends are human. They will make mistakes and let you down. If they are a true friend, give them the benefit of the doubt. And remember, friendships will change. It is just part of life. Sometimes it will be time to let a friendship go, and that is okay.

4. To have a good friend, you must be a good friend. Be loyal, caring, and dependable. Listen, but don’t be afraid to lean on your friends for advice and support.

5. Even though it might sometimes seem that your friends are living a better life than you do–maybe they have more stuff, maybe they are an only child and get lots of attention, maybe they have tons of brothers and sisters and that seems fun, maybe they live in a huge house, maybe they take major vacations – whatever the case, or whatever the reason is that you think they have a life that you want – the grass is not greener. The life you have is exactly the one meant for you. The life you have can be whatever you want it to be. And, if you count your blessings and appreciate what you have, you will have the greatest life of all.

This also goes along with living in the moment. Always be living in the moment and enjoy what you do have. Don't worry about what everyone else have.

6. Love your brother. Sam might get on your nerves, but he is the only sibling you have. As you get older, he will become more and more important to you. You and Sam share a bond that you will never have with anyone else. Cherish that.

And maybe it isn't a Sam...maybe its a Tyler...either way, it is your sibling and no one with appreciate you and understand you more than them.

7. Cut your parents some slack. They are not perfect either, although they are doing the best that they can. As you get older, you will blame them for things – just remember that we always loved you and tried to do what we thought was the right thing for your growth and happiness.  8. Don’t hold grudges, life is too short.

9. Think about what you love to do and think about it a lot. Make sure you do bits of these things everyday. Always have the big picture in mind, and think forward to how you can bring the love and passion for those things into your life as you get older. This might happen in your job, by having children, in your marriage, who knows. Just never lose sight of the simple things that make you happy.

10. Be active. Not for the purpose of being thin or looking a certain way but because it makes you a better, more well-rounded person. Being active and moving your body will relieve stress, will put your life in perspective, will keep you young.

11. If you hurt someone, say you are sorry.

Its ok to say your sorry, and 99% of the time it will fix our little mistakes that we are bound to make. Once you are ok with making the mistakes you will be ok with saying 'I'm sorry.'

12. Do not worry. Worry will eat you up inside. Do your best everyday, then let the little things go. Things have a way of working themselves out. One of the best things to learn at a young age is that we cannot control things. The harder we try to make things a certain way, the more we will suffer because things NEVER hardly go as planned. Do your best to be open to the mystery of life.
 

So that is her list...and now my list...too many great lessons there that I only hope will benefit someone!

low points...getting better, hopefully!

As I was sitting in the dentist chair yesterday for the first time in probably 5 years I was busy stressing out about 32 other things I need to be doing. They took my blood pressure; "text book, perfect," they said. This is unusually high for me and do you know what message that sent to me? You let it all get to you! You allowed all of it (the negative happenings in life) finally break you down. I have always, always prided myself in letting things just be, however it was meant to be will always work itself out, there is no reason to stress about it. And here I did just that. I don't have an answer why I allowed it, and now that I have I'm struggling on how to let it all go.

After two weeks of negative after negative filtering in my life, I'm trying really really hard to learn my lesson but in the end I just end up in tears. I think I have cried more in the past two weeks than I have cried in the past year. I would rather not rehash everything because I'm trying really hard to remember only positives.

I'm going to look at the 'blood pressure, light bulb moment' to be the moment as I remember everything getting better and I'm going to list every positive thing that happened in the last two weeks... Here goes ...

-- All 4 of us had great check ups at the dentist (except for 1 minor issue that was already taken care of)

-- I was able (forced) to rest/mend my tired/achy muscles.

-- I had some extra time to play board games with my kids

-- I have had the opportunity to read a book about appreciating what I have in the present

--I have been reminded that I am surrounded by great friends and supportive family

-- I got my taxes all done and ready to mail in

I know, not a very long list but its a start. And the start is always the hardest part.

So I'm going to choose to focus on the positives for now...And try to get my life back to normal.

Training frustrations, starting early

I know you were all expecting this post, probably thought it would have been later in the week, but alas, here we are on Monday and I'm already stressed about not running. I had a very busy weekend, I can't even remember if I went to run Friday morning. I was supposed to run three miles on Saturday and I didn't do it because of the snow, but instead I tried a new workout on a FitWall. I'm still sore from that, and it was great interval training. Then this morning the alarm went off to go run another 3 miles and my body wouldn't move. I'm so tired, probably a combination of the training, the running kids everywhere and only being at my house for sleeping over the weekend. I read a blog this morning and the author wrote last week that she was frustrated with her running because she seemed so tired and runs were hard etc etc. But happy to report that this week is easier. I so hope that things align for me, sooner than later. I keep telling myself that missing a run or two is not a big deal as long as all the long runs are met. I hope I'm not fooling myself. Palisade is a great course and I just want to feel good and hopefully do better than the 2:02 from last year. Hopefully with combing my running with some other total body strengthening things will come together, like a perfect storm.

Brooke had a dance competition over the weekend. This one went much smoother than last month's and I'm happy to report that Brooke was much nicer to me this time than last. It helps that she knows what to expect now and I know what to expect, so I'm a lot better prepared. 2 of her dances scored better than last time and 1 of them made it into the top 10; I'm happy to see the improvement. Makes all those hours of driving around and waiting worth it.

Palisade update & others

Training for Palisade has officially started. I've got my long runs, I've been doing more stuff on the treadmill than ever before, I've only skipped a few of the runs during the week, mostly because of weather. However, I have yet to run a true tempo run. Really, I know I'm scared of it, but that isn't why I haven't run one yet. The first week, it was snowing so crazy that I decided it wouldn't be safe, the next week my partner that I recruited ditched me. And now, my partner has ditched me yet again, but I'm running. It might not be a true tempo run, but will be miles and hopefully that will help. Over the weekend I ended up running over 17 miles. I didn't plan it that way, it just happened. And although I was exhausted on Sunday night, my body handled the mileage pretty well. I'm sure there is a lesson here, that maybe a marathon wouldn't be totally out of the question. The first track session of the year started this week also. I felt good, but I didn't push it for best times, I was aiming for 10k pace and I was able to do that. That makes me happy and I'm at a good starting point for the year. The kind of frustrating part of this deal is that this week my mileage will be closer to 30, next week based on the schedule is about 1/2. I know I should love the recovery weeks but they scare me into thinking I'm not going to be prepared.

This was from a beautiful snowy day that we spent in Evergreen ice skating and sledding! So much fun!

 

Because I know everyone cares about other things than just my running issues...I will update...Tyler just finished up with indoor soccer. Although they didn't do great as far as winning games, they did grow as a team and really get the concept of passing and defending and holding positions. Tyler has been playing much better and I'm so happy to see the growth. Tyler has also started piano lessons. He loves the teacher and has decided that he wants to play in the recital. Which is great, except the recital is in a month and he has only been playing for a month. He will do great I know...but wow! Brooke is still dancing. Her dances have made it to nationals, so she is happy and the memories she will make and remember will be amazing. She is also playing the piano and doing very well. I'm happy to see her hold it all together.

Palisade training

Official training for me starts on Monday for the Grand Valley 1/2. I'm not sure why I feel like it is such a big deal. It isn't as if I haven't been going to the gym and running. Maybe it is because I have taken the time this year to write down some goals and in order for those goals to happen, one must train for them. I have been running long enough and had enough disappointing finishes to know that you can't just pray for a strong race, you have to train your butt off and pray for it.

Perhaps I'm also a little nervous because I have decided to try a new training plan for myself this time around. Before, I have always had someone tell me how to do things and when to do them and this time I am a little more on my own. It will be good for me, to push myself, not rely on others to keep the pace but learn to feel it all on my own. I have taken a training plan from Hal Higdon for an advanced runner (which I question if I'm even qualified for) then I tweaked it a little and then another coach/friend tweaked it again for me. This time I'm including tempo runs, which quite frankly, scare me. They sound hard and intimidating and did I say hard? On those runs I will have to run with someone as I usually don't push myself like I could/should. And instead of going by miles on my long runs I will be going by time. I tried this method once before and it didn't work out so well. However, there is this thing, called consistency and that may have been part of the problem. I'm aiming for a 1 hour 50 min 1/2 marathon time. Grand Valley is a hard course so I will need to train hills and flats alike. I'm excited, yet intimidated by the schedule. One day at a time though. Yesterday I read an article mentioning how to focus your time during marathon / 1/2 marathon training. I'm still learning. This is probably part of the reason I haven't signed up for a marathon, I can barely get my training for a 1/2 in let alone doubling the mileage.

I'm excited for this race, as it has been since last August that I have been in 'training.' My last couple of 5k's have been a little disappointing just because I hoped for more and when you aren't working on turnover and speed and hills you don't have great races. You just race. I remember trying to remind myself that it is off season, I will be fine. And you know what, from a year ago my 5K is faster...just not my fastest. I guess I do understand that there will eventually be a time when I won't be working on getting faster, instead working toward staying the same. For right now I'm going to hope I'm continuing to get faster, it is kinda motivating.